Atlas Twp. – Sue Hegel’s home is a place where her children feel comfortable. So do their friends.
On a clean white fence section outside the house, road signs are painted. The basement is a kids? sanctuary, and graham cracker-and-frosting cookies are a silly childhood treat for her children, Mason Sarver, a Goodrich High School senior, and Jenny Sarver, a GHS sophomore.
Hegel lives in a lovely Atlas Township home with Mason, Jenny, and a yellow lab named Brandy. She works nearby, so she can be close to her children.
She’s divorced, but has found a way to foster the important things in life for her children: a loving family, faith, a support system, education, and character traits that will last a lifetime.
Hegel, who comes from an old Goodrich family’the one the road’s named after’has always lived in the area.
She was born in the former Goodrich hospital, located across the street from the home her family rented.
‘My mom called Dad at work and said, ‘Oh, it’s time,? and walked over there,? said Hegel, who seems to have inherited the same practical common sense.
Growing up, her parents gave her encouragement, self-respect, and the ability to believe in herself.
When Mason and Jenny were very young, Hegel’a stay-at-home mom at the time’meant business when it came to behaving.
‘I was very strict, just like my father and mother raised me,? she said. ‘They knew pretty much by age 2 the look. I could take them to any restaurant.?
Despite dealing with major hurdles’like open-heart surgery when Jenny was young’Hegel expected normal behavior from her kids. Like testing their limits.
‘I gave ’em a little rope to see what they did with it. If they messed up I pulled it right back.?
Although the early teen years are a challenge for any parent, Sue didn’t find it necessary to become overprotective.
‘The more they knew the rules and what was expected and not expected, the more lenient I became,? she said.
With the leniency was one caveat.
‘If they weren’t following the rules,? she said, snapping her fingers, ‘their world could change right now.?
As children turn into young adults, responsible mentors can make a difference, she says. Robotics team parents have been influential in Hegel’s family.
‘I definitely want to give them credit,? says Hegel. ‘In our small-knit community here it’s nice that they can trust other people.?
Single parenting has its own set of challenges.
‘A single income is very hard. A lot of things we go without just because we don’t have that second income,? she said.
‘Sometimes it’s hard because I’m pulling up to a softball game in an old car, but in the long run the kids are just a little bit prouder of what we do have’it’s harder to get.?
The trade-off for such challenges is the knowledge that it’s character-building.
‘Jenny’s excited to get Mason’s old car,? says Hegel.
Maintaining a good relationship with her children’s father has been very important.
‘You have to think more about your children than yourself,? she says, emphasizing the rule is to ‘never say a bad word about the other parent?, and teaching caring and respect by helping the kids shop for a Father’s Day or Christmas gift.
Simple things, like making her kids laugh by cutting grilled cheese sandwiches into kiddie shapes, are what Hegel likes in her household.
‘Stay happy,? she says, with her roll-with-the-punches attitude. ‘I don’t like anger in my house.?
Hegel is the first to admit life’s not perfect, but improvises accordingly, cancelling business appointments if her children need her, or finding ways to manage what comes her way.
‘I stay out in my shop and clean if I’m in a really bad mood, just kind of unwind before I bring it home.?
As her children grow up, life’s become smoother, she says.
And yet it’s not so easy, she reflects, knowing she’ll need tissues on hand for Mason’s upcoming graduation ceremony.
She wonders how she’ll deal with his college life at Kettering.
The years have gone too fast, she says, like any mom looking back over the childhood stages. She’s seen her son and daughter go from being smiling babies to doting on children themselves; from being her responsibility to showing responsibility for others.
Recently, dressed in prom attire, her children took time away from their big night to visit her father, Jim Hegel, in the hospital as he awaited heart surgery.
‘He cried,? she said. ‘It was very touching.?
Hegel and her siblings recently arranged a 50th anniversary party for their parents. Looking around at a room full of children and grandchildren, her parents were ‘tickled they’re there.?
‘Which is how it’s supposed to be. You should be able to sit back and look around at what you started, right??