Michelle gets a pull, Jennifer gets a push

Groin pulls are for men. Big, ol? football-playing, track-running, rebounding, and sliding into bases men get groin injuries.
Girls should get something else. It just ain’t ladylike to read about a female pulling her groin. When Michelle Kwan had to remove herself from Olympic skating competition couldn’t her doctors or publicist have just said she had a muscle sprain, pulled ligament or ate too much Italian pasta?
Guys have groins. Girls have lower stomach pains. Guys get kicked in ’em. I’ve never seen a girl grab herself like guys do. And, I never want to. There’s got to be a less image-producing word for what girls get.
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Seriously, if our governor injured her lower abdominal region do you think anyone would say she had a groin injury?
The headline might be ‘Jenny hurt,? but never ‘Jenny quits race due to groin injury.?
Her publicist would down play the sore area, just as they have her Michigan job loss record. Though Michigan has the third highest unemployment (Mississippi and Louisiana are higher) figures our Teflon coated (didn’t our government decide recently Teflon is now poisonous?) governor says it isn’t her fault, it’s because George Bush isn’t doing enough for our state.
Damn George Bush for doing so much for 49 states and nothing for Michigan.
Which brings me to a windup of anything political this week. George Weeks writes: ‘Granholm has a recognizably liberal recovery plan: The state has borrowed $2 billion to be invested by people her administration calls ‘independent job-creation experts.? Translation: The $2 billion is a politically useful fund to be distributed to favored business executives.?
More Weeks: ‘Granholm’s expected GOP rival in November, Richard DeVos, is for free trade, which Democrats say has devastated Michigan’s economy.?
Wonder if I can rent my yard art manure spreader to either of them through November?
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Think about it: Who do you get mad at most often? With me it’s me. Not only do I get maddest at me, but it lasts longer than any of my other madnesses.
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I have a ‘personal? folder. Doesn’t everybody? I’ve shoved stuff in it for years. Recently I went all the way through it and found my first letter to the editor. It was written March 18, 1946 to LIFE magazine.
I was a sailor in Virginia. Not far away is William and Mary College. I and some fellow gobs thought ‘co-eds? and went seeking. We were rejected outright.
I wrote, ‘In order to speak to a coed of William and Mary College it is necessary to present to the Dean two character references from prominent citizens of the man’s home town, approval of his commanding officer and an interview with the dean. After that he might get a Social Card which gives him the privilege to talk to an American girl.?
And, ‘When an American girl is old enough to enroll in a college, she surely is old enough to choose her own company. It seems impossible that a group of students could tolerate such an arrogant, sophisticated attitude, because we aren’t all ‘Blue Bloods.?
LIFE was apparently being edited by a bunch of blue bloods, who took offense because my letter was never published.
Or, was my letter censored by one of those blue blood officers on our ship?

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