Catching up by wading in

Gosh, it’s been so long since we talked.
How you been? How’s the family? Seen any good movies?
For me, it’s been a time for accumulation. I’ve been taking notes on everything from whatever happened to Condoleezza Rice, to aging, vegetables, dog food, advertising slogans, to happiness according to current son-in-law Bob.
Please note the omissions of health care, Tiger Woods, the professional (?) teams in Detroit and the weather. Actually, I have these memorized as opposed to actual written notes.
Multiple ads drew my attention. Like the one about the walk-in bath that provides hydro therapy. Isn’t that akin to waterboarding, which the current administration has outlawed? The makers of that bath should be given a fair trial, then hanged, like in the old west.
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Why have I put YAZ birth control pills right next to Coors and Bud Lite notes? Thoughts come and go too fast during the holiday season.
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One of the rewarding experiences I’ve been able to get away with while aging stubbornly, is greeting babies being pushed around stores by the mommies.
They are so darn cute (both the babies and their mothers) that I can’t help praising them. Their reaction is warming to an old guy. Used to be I’d hesitate offering greetings lest I be looked at as a pervert. Now I can say things like, ‘You have a beautiful child. Did you get her in aisle seven?? Oh, well. It’s fun for me.
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During my growing up days on the farm, we had lots of dogs and always our gardens had carrots. Never did one of our dogs dig up a carrot to eat. So, why does Beneficial Dog Food brag about having this veggy in their food? If dogs liked ’em they’d dig ’em! Sometimes I think pet food makers are taking lessons from global warming, climate change pushers. They’ve convinced themselves of the need, so let’s promote carrots as a health food for dogs. Well, my Shayna ain’t getting carrots from me.
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Early in football’s bowl season I noted that Kay Jewelers became a sponsor. At first I couldn’t understand why a jeweler would spend all that money on what is basically something for gals. Then a couple reasons forged their way through my thick skull. First, I believe every broadcast now features an attractive woman attempting to ask self-answering questions, just like their male counterparts. So, female audiences are the Kay target. Second, earrings and necklaces are apparently now an official part of the player’s dress. I’ll feel a lot better about this when all the coaches join in.
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Then there was this holiday ‘cheer-up? note from Detroit News columnist Nolan Finley. To make yourself feel better he suggests picking up a tab for a stranger in a restaurant, pay for someone’s bread and milk at the check-out counter or hand a passerby a Lottery ticket. Recently, a young lady was ahead of me in the gas station. She was paying for $5 worth of gas. I said to the clerk, ‘I’ll pay hers.? She lit up, all smiles and thanks. But, while I thought of savings, she apparently had her mind made up to spend the $5, so she went to the snack rack. But, like Nolan said, it felt good for a while.
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Daughter Luan’s Bob, ‘Happiness is a deer and a beer and pictures with the guys by the lunchtime cook-out in the woods.? Of course, he was the only one who got a buck.
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There’s an old Statler Brothers song that laments the direction of (then) today’s entertainment industry. Its chorus goes, ‘Whatever happened to Randolph Scott ridin? the trail alone? Whatever happened to Gene and Tex, and Roy, and Rex, the Durango Kid? Oh, whatever happened to Randolph Scott, his horse plain as could be? . . . ?
That ‘whatever happened to . . .? phrase came to me as I was wondering about former Secretary of State Condoleezza Rice.
In my mind, she was far superior to current Secretary of State Hillary Clinton. Ms. Rice has class, smarts, style, charisma, courage and leadership qualities.
In addition to her political career, she is an accomplished concert pianist, as well as a big-time National Football League fan and former Stanford U professor and provost. She signed with the William Morris Agency to represent them however they wish, but not on talk shows.
Ms. Clinton is . . . .?

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