For some absurd reason unknown to me, my wife has this crazy idea that I, your hero, Dandy Don Rush, use too many cliches. She has even had the audacity to label me the proverbial, King of Cliche.
Come on, Honey. I need another title like I need another hole in the head (United States Slang, circa 1940s — referring to a bullet to the head.)
I reckon, however, truth is stranger than fiction (which Byron wrote in Don Juan sometime in the 1820s). I admit it. I use them.
It’s not that I try to use cliches, it’s just that I’ve heard them since I was knee high to a grasshopper (around by the 1850s — used in the newspaper, The Democratic Review, in 1851.) Do I like cliches? I answer, ‘Are the Kennedys gunshy??
Of course, I’ve taken a shine to cliches. They’re handy. And, I’m not smart enough to articulate my thoughts on my own. Besides, there’s a nice fitting cliche for any and every occasion.
Why just this week when five-year-old Shamus, said, ‘Well, Sean was . . . (doing something he wasn’t supposed to),? I went into automatic cliche mode. I didn’t have to think and from my lips came . . .
‘If Sean jumps off the roof and breaks his leg, are you gonna? jump off, too??
‘Well, Sean hit me first,? Shamus said.
‘Two wrongs don’t make a right,? I fired back.
Shamus could only thrust out his lower lip in a pout. He had nothing to say, no comeback. End of discussion. You might say, he had shot his wad (which dates back to about 1925 — even though folks were shooting wads since the first hunks of metal were fired from a barrel of a gun).
Bottom line, cliches work. I like that in a product and I surely like it in speaking patterns and parenting. They’re so simple and to the point.
Other of my favorites:
‘How do you like them apples??
(From the 1961 Edward Albee play, ‘The American Dream.?)
‘The whole kit and caboodle.?
(First referenced in 1785 and then again in the book, ‘Red Badge of Courage,? 1895.)
‘And how!?
(First noted in 1865, with origins to the German intensive, und wie.)
‘I guess we’re in a bit of a sticky wicket.?
‘From the sport of cricket. A wicket is the structure a batsman aims for and a defender, well, defends.)
Like I said, I’m not that smart, so I just don’t know the origins of these cliches. On the contrary, I didn’t know until the other day, when Dear Jen sauntered into the kitchen after a bit of garage saling. Among her finds was a book, that she bought just for me, The Dictionary of Cliches, by James Rogers.
I think Jen bought it as a joke, but, holy phraseology, Batman, methinks I got some new material! Hot damn! Lookout world, Don’s got over 2,000 cliches right at his fingertips.
And, it does my heart good (The forerunner of this expression appeared in 1413 in The Pylgremage of the Sowle, ‘The syght . . . gladyd moche my harte.?)
Lucky you.
Lucky Jen.
Lucky boys.
Before you say this column is for the birds (from JD Salinger’s Catcher in the Rye — 1951), here are some interesting cliche factoids.
Hell Has No Fury Like A Woman Scorned — dates back to 1697 in a play called, ‘The Mourning Bride.?
The Road to Hell is Paved With Good Intentions — And, dates back to 1574.
There’ll be hell to pay — from the Napoleonic Wars, 1811.
Don’t you find it as interesting as I do, that we still use phrases that are 500 years and older? Well, maybe you wouldn’t, because you’re not the King of Cliche.
Comments for the cliched Rush can be e-mailed to: dontrushmedon@aol.com